Tuesday, March 29, 2016

In which we throw a dressage test together

I wrote in my last post about how I was starting to wig out a little bit from not running through any of my tests for this year yet. I did run through 2-2 for the first time the day after I printed it off a month of so ago I guess, but overall--lack of preparation, my Type A brain is about to combust thanks to you.

Obviously, being the ever diligent person I am (ha!), I watched lots of 1-2, 1-3, 2-2, and 2-3 tests on youtube yesterday afternoon, and I was pleasantly surprised that I had a relatively solid memory of all of those tests from reading through them eons ago. That meant that during this morning's ride we were going to do a test or bust!

"let's just bust."
kids spring spreak camp is on right now, so rides
are going to be early this week. bobby says too early. 

Bobby was fucking fabuloso warming up right off the bat. Sweet justice, what a lovely light feather face he was. I would have taken that work into the ring any day. Since I didn't need to do much to him, I kept it short and sweet before going into test mode. Of course, once I was ready to ride, I completely forgot most of 1-2. I mean, I knew the parts, just where they were supposed to go was getting muddled. But I did remember all of 1-3 and that's what we went with instead.

And so I bring you a play-by-play of the movements--all memorized obvi because #genius--of how our second full dressage test practice run of the year went.

"no pictures, just naps."

Enter at A, halt at X, salute, trot off, yada yada: Good! Square, forward thinking halt, trotted off without having to be beaten back into movement.

Turn left, lengthen trot across diagonal only not to F but the one before that in a standard arena: BM: "Ooh, you look so fancy!" Quiet, lovely, forward, no problems.

Leg yield zig zag down the long side: Bobby: "WHAT IS HAPPENING MOVE OVER WHY SO FAST WHAT ARE FEET JUST TRIPPED OVER MY OWN LEG HURRY LEGS WE'RE MOVING HURRY WAIT FOR ME TOO FAST OH NO NOW SIDEWAYS OTHER WAY OKAY REMAIN CALM EVERYTHING IS FINE." Me: "Uh, what was that, BM?" BM: "Extra points for creating your own movement?"

Stretchy trot at C: The shit. Damn, this horse loves his stretchies now.

Retarded fucking ten meter circle right at B, halt randomly and chill at X, another stupid as shit ten meter circle at E: What the fuck even is this movement? I was talking to BM still, but was cognizant enough to remain in posting trot after our stretchy circle so the tiny right circle wasn't too bad though Bobby thought about throwing a fit. Halt was fine, other circle was fine.

Walk at A, free walk across diagonal to letter before H, trot at H: Free walk was ballin' which is a rarity, and while he got a little above my hand coming back to the medium walk, I know it was because I was too quick with the reins and not quick enough with my seat. I demand perfection from Bobby, he's starting to demand it right back. No cheating anymore with this dude.

Canter at C, immediately make a wild 15m circle also at C: I fucking hate this movement. I hated it last year and I hate it this year. Bobby also hated it. He went spinning off into a different dimension when I asked him to canter, but I just kicked him forward and told him to get over himself. Bobby: "BUT SO HARD RIGHT CAN'T CIRCLE WHAT IS CANTER WHY YOU TELLING ME GO FORWARD LET'S FIGHT THIS OUT WHY ARE YOU KICKING ME I DON'T KNOW CANTER BUT MAYBE....okay, false, nevermind! Just kidding, it's fine. Chill mode re-engaged. Let's carry on."

Lengthen canter down long side, canter counter loop down other long side: Fine, fine.

Change rein through trot at X: Fine, though Bobby almost dropped down to the walk instead.

15m circle at A: Fuck you.

Lengthen down long side, counter canter loop down other long side: Whatever, fine, no problems.

Trot at A (?), lengthen trot across diagonal: Solids.

Turn in at B, halt and salute at G: Bobby: "WHY ARE WE TURNING RIGHT AGAIN I THOUGHT WE TALKED ABOUT THIS HATE RIG--oh, it's over? Right, off we go."

the best dressage horse i know.

So. A little dramatic here and there, but when he wasn't having opinions, he was fucking phenomenal. I let him have a long, long walk break, then quietly came back and reschooled the leg yield zig zag and right lead canter work. He was lovely and soft throughout, and I called it quits there with lots of pats and cookies.

Things could be going worse at this point!

15 comments:

  1. As long as you have Bobby's commentary, there's no way you can lose.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Woo hoo! Love the commentary! Can't wait to see some video of all this:)

    ReplyDelete
  3. sounds pretty darn good to me! extra points for creativity in newly discovered movenets in the leg yield zig zag lolz

    ReplyDelete
  4. Really can't complain about that. I haven't even touched a test this year and we're supposed to go to a "horse show" on Sunday. The hell. Whoops.

    Btw LOVING the bridle. Good choice.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Lol. If only they'd let us walk on a loose rein until pony marbles were reinstalled and try again DURING the tests. We would excel at that kind of dressage. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  6. "Canter at C, immediately make a wild 15m circle also at C." OMG I snorted. I HATE THIS MOVEMENT. Satan himself wrote that portion of the test.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm now going to be disappointed with all the standard language in tests. I like your version much better!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Your recap is priceless! Have you seen the video with the terrible test reader, you guys should team up, all the funnies!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Sounds awesome, all the talk about turning right made me think of Zoolander haha

    ReplyDelete
  10. I think you need to rock the purple dressage pad at the first show. Or else.

    ReplyDelete
  11. It's funny how the pieces by themselves aren't so hard, but doing all of them strung together gets so much more difficult. Go Bobby for being a (mostly) grown up about the whole thing!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Haha! favourite line: "bonus points for creating your own movement".

    ReplyDelete

If you can't say anything nice, fuck off.